Welcome back to this three-part article series about building your best business, your team…and now, how to attract what you want in business and in life. If you need to catch up, check out part one (Create Your Best Business) and part two (Wisdom to Build Your Team).
Now get ready for Sammy Blindell to tell us how she recommends you attract what you want, so you can have everything you want.
If you’d prefer to watch the video of the Brand Builders TV episode from which these articles have been taken, How to Build your Brand without Burning Out Part 2, feel free to do so below.
But we before we get on with it, let’s spend a moment with Sammy.
This is Sammy Blindell
Once again, it’s time to learn it, model it and get shit done. Let’s go!
How to Attract What You Want in Every Area of Life
Here’s the next step: Get a piece of paper or take notes in your phone.
From top to bottom, write the numbers 1, 2, 3, 4, 5. Now think about the five people, groups, communities or customers whom you spend the most time with.
Think about the last seven days. Whom have you spoken to the most?
It could be your children, your parents, customers, a forum or community.
Now get back into the energy where you visualised your 10/10 life and business. And one at a time, write a score of 1 through 10 next to each of those people or groups. Be totally honest about how well they support your 10/10 visualisation. 1 is the lowest, 10 is the highest score.
How do you feel looking at those numbers?
I do this about every six months, to reevaluate whether or not I’m where I need to be.
We can be overwhelmed by some of the people we’re doing things for, and it can be very one-way. You can be so busy helping them to achieve their dream that your dream gets forgotten along the way. It’s not reciprocal. We can get to a point where we’re completely saturated, trying to balance so many things. We keep loading it on.
This can really hold us back, keeping us in the splits position. You’ve got one foot in your loyalty and values toward the people around you. And the other foot is saying, “I’m still loyal. I’m still that person. But something’s gotta give.”
If you’re going to achieve this and be a great example for your customers of what this fabulous life (business, team, health, etc.) looks like, you’ll have to let go of some of the things that are holding you back. And yes, some of those things might be people.
Here’s what I found when I went through this painful process. It can take me ages to make a decision, but once I’ve made that decision, bam, it’s done and so it is. It’s non-negotiable and I can’t go back on it. I’m totally committed.
Does that happen with you?
When I looked at my list, I saw my very first customer on that list, next to #1. This person was my first customer, in my first business, in 2002. And I had rated him a 10. All day, I thought of him and who I could refer him to. We were just referral machines for each other.
#2 was my mum. And she was rated a 2. I looked at that number and burst into tears. I really wanted her to be a 10. When I looked at that number, I thought, Sam, you’ve not been fair. You’ve given her a 2, but how could she possibly help you to achieve this vision when you’ve never told her what it is? I didn’t even know, so how could I have communicated that to her?
So I committed that I would take a trip to France (I lived in the UK at the time) and tell my mum what my dreams were—and about this vision that I’d seen and what I actually wanted.
And she became a 100 out of 10. She makes the one drop jewelry, she’s part of the business, she’s my greatest ambassador and one my best friends on the planet. She went from a 2 to a 10 just by me being clear about what I wanted, so I could let her know what I wanted.
Number 3 on my list was my ex-husband. He was a narcissist, but I didn’t know what that was. All I knew was that I had become a very different person to the one I’d been ten years earlier, when we’d gotten together. It was heartbreaking, but he got a 1. I wasn’t happy in the relationship. My needs weren’t being met. I didn’t feel fulfilled. I wasn’t happy, and it was leaking into everything else. Me not being happy was making everything else unhappy.
You’ll find that if you go to a business coach, you might think they're going to sort out the business, but all they really do is sort you out. Then you sort the business out. That’s totally what was happening.
I’d gone through the guilt and the shame of failing. It was just a marriage. It was supposed to be easy. How could it be that I’d failed at this? For about two years, I went through all those emotions.
He wasn’t helping me to have the life or the business I wanted. He was constantly trying to pull me out of the business, and always letting me down. He was vicious, vindictive, aggressive…and it was all leaking into my business.
I was throwing myself into the business to avoid my marriage. The business was growing, but the marriage got worse. And actually, he did me a big favour. About a week after I’d made the decision to leave, he gave me an ultimatum. He said it had to be him or the business. I chose the business.
He still regrets that to this day.
You don’t have to go to the extremes that I did, but I was in a deeply traumatic place where I had a foot in each life. It was too painful. I couldn’t manage it anymore. For me, that was something that had to go, and it went.
The final two people on my list were two friends, who when I really thought about it, were really low numbers. It was shocking—a horrible thing to go through—to realise that the people who surrounded me got such low ratings.
But now my life is amazing. I have a wonderful husband whom I wouldn’t have if I had kept holding on tight for fear of failure in that first marriage. My life is 100 out of 10. I had to let go of all that stuff.
Those two friends were so self-absorbed. I was constantly helping them, and they just weren’t right for me.
Showing up, to Attract What You Want
I had to get really clear about who was going to be my 10/10 people. How would they show up? Who would they be? What kind of values would they have? How would I show up for them, and how would that affect other relationships because my love tank was full?
There’s a book you might want to read, if you haven’t already. It’s called The Five Love Languages, by Gary Chapman. That book helped me to get super-clear about my own love language, as well as the love languages of those around me. It helped me enormously in business as well, so I could better understand how other people needed me to show up for them.
That got me thinking: if I’m going to have the best people show up for me, then I’ve got to be the best demonstration of who that is. It was really about me getting clear about who I needed to be so more of that would show up.
And that meant I had to figure out what One Drop really stood for. It was about that time, back in 2002, that I realised I had been looking externally, outside myself, for role models. I was looking for people to inspire me. But I couldn’t find it.
It was then that I discovered if I wanted to be surrounded by 10/10s, across the board, I needed to get really clear about me. Who was I? Who am I as the One Drop? Who do I want to be? What would a great role model look like and how would that role model show up? How would that person act around other people? If they were a real One Drop, how often would they show up? And what would they show up doing? Who would they be if they were in their best energy and their best intention, 100 percent of the time?
I got focussed on what that should look like and then I set out to be that person. Because I knew that if I could be the best demonstration of what I wanted to attract, I would attract One Drops from everywhere. My reticular activator would be looking for more One Drops, just like that.
And when I started to be the One Drop, I started to attract the One Drop. I attracted the most amazing mentors and friends. I couldn’t even list my five now. There are too many.
Attract What You Want: Be a One Drop
Everyone reading this right now is a One Drop for me. You’re being a One Drop for yourself and for each other.
I’m sending some One Drops out today, in fact. If you haven’t gotten your One Drop, to be part of this One Drop movement and be a OneDropPreneur, you can go to onedropmovement.com.
To get into that One Drop energy, really look at your list (the list of the people you spend the most time with). Ask yourself if there are people, groups or communities on that list that you’d like to make a 10. Look at the difference between those numbers. If it’s a low number, how can you make it a high number? And do you want to make it a high number? Or is there a part of you that realises it’s time to bring new energy into your life?
Maybe you need new role models. Maybe there’s someone else who’s already in your life. Perhaps there’s another Brand Builders Club member whom you haven’t gotten to know yet. Maybe they don’t even know about your business, so they’re currently a 0/10.
What if you picked three Brand Builders Club members whom you could be the One Drop for, so they could then be the One Drop for you? And got really intentional to move forward?
I’m just so excited for you, getting into that 10/10 business life and letting go so you can grow.
You Can Attract What You Want, Just Like Sammy
Have we got you thinking about what you want to attract into your life and business? And how you can manifest that in the way you show up?
You can’t stop there! You’re on a roll. Right now, subscribe to the Brand Builders TV YouTube channel to check out the loads of other fabulous Brand Builders who are sharing their wisdom with you, to better your life and your business. Then, Like and Follow the Brand Builders TV Facebook page to make sure you never miss a new episode or a conversation about past episodes.